change

there has been a slight change of direction in my life.  am i going to say that it is a good thing? no, but i am not going to say it is a bad thing. sometimes people just have to say and do what they know and feel is right for them to do no matter what anyone else is going to say or think. i did that, and so did she. problem was that they were two different stories. anyway,

 today is the first day of the rest of my life.

i miss you already.

direction

i need a compass to tell me where to go from here.

Love

Webster defines love as:

an intense feeling of deep affection.

the bible defines love as patient, kind, not envious, not boastful, not proud, not rude, not self-seeking, not easy to be angered, a keeper of no wrongs, it does not like evil, it rejoices in the truth. It says that love will always:

protects 

trusts

hopes

always perseveres

love never fails

many people say that they "love" this and "love" that, but if you can read the written above and say that your love fulfills all of those things then i need to meet you. love is something that everyone no matter who you are longs for deep down.  and with that said a study online i found said: that in the US more than one million children each year experience the breakup of their families. what goes wrong?

this is my personal opinion:

love is something that no one will every truly understand because we are all human and the only one that has ever shown true unfailing love is Jesus. people hold each other up as these idols in a way hoping that their love will not fail them, and when it does storms begin to form and people are hurt.

love in my experience takes work and work and more work. i think that it should start out natural. You cant force love and if you do you find trouble. but when love hits you in the forehead then roll with it. but at some point you have to make conscience effort to make things work. love is hard and i don't know if i have all that it takes to love someone to the extent that Christ has loved me but i know that i want more than anything to get there. i make more mistakes than anyone i know, and i am constantly trying to be a better person and i know that one day i will attain all that He has for me.

i am not perfect 

i have flaws

and i know that i am constantly scared of letting people in my heart

i want to be an open door

i want to experience real love

"the world is only temporary everybody is scared that there will be no one too"

the future is bright.

faccia strana

i run when i want to think about things without actually thinking about them, if that makes any sense at all. i feel like when i am running my head is cleared out and even though i prob only thought about the things in my head at first, i feel so much better when i get back from a run. 

today i got home from work and went on a run. it was raining the whole time and it felt like i was in a movie. the year is more than half over and there are still so many things that i want to accomplish before it ends. 24 is right around the corner for me, so i better get on it. 

 

under the open sky

have you ever made a wish that came true? 

i have. . .

i still rememeber

awake.

beauty in the unknown.

every single one of these pictures brings an amazing memory to my mind.

 

wish

"we all make mistakes"


my feet hurt because there are holes on the bottom of them.
we had a pool party today. I love the pool but it always seemed
so much cooler when you were little. there were like 40 balls being thrown.
one hit me in the throat.
i guess when you are little the pool is like the ocean.

haircut by charis
chipotle
starbucks
cannon hill

insomnia provokes the brain

ok work with me on this one. 

i cant sleep and in my tossing and turning,

a revelation hit me. a comparison of two thing.

tan lines vs. a persons past

here is what i was thinking:

tans lines are inevitable to happen if you are human and you expose yourself to the sun.

a persons past is also inevitable if you live breathe, and walk around planet earth.

here is the connection. people will try and hide the fact that they have tan lines by using tanning beds or i guess just tanning naked in their back yards, dont really know.

anyway

and much like the past people will try and hide things from others instead of just being themselves mistakes and all. 

the people who dont really care about having tan lines are the people who live their lives knowing that they have made mistakes and better yet know that they will make mistakes in the future but still manage to take their shirt off at the pool exposing the most amazing farmers tan. just what i was thinking. . 

dont know why or how my brain thinks these things. 

when i listen closer

music can change a nation. 

it can change a persons attitude.

it can dictate your next feeling.

it can bring you back to an exact moment in time where you remember everything to the letter; from what you were wearing to what you ate that morning.

it has power.